"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." — Gautama Buddha
Becoming a mother and wife has been such an amazing + beautiful experience for me. My children and husband brings so much joy and peace into my life, and I'm forever grateful to be able to experience such an authentic love.
But, the question is....
Can you balance self-care, motherhood, being a wife, working full-time and other things?
Absolutely.
Is it hard? Hell yeah.
But it's definitely worth it for you, your peace of mind and family.
I've noticed a huge shift in my emotional, mental and physical well-being when I take time away from my children and husband to focus on my self-care.
Implementing self-care into my daily life has caused me to become more patient, gentle, present, loving and overall full of JOY to my children and husband.
Self-care doesn't always have to involve you leaving your house and spending money.
Self-care is really about doing something that you enjoy doing.
Self-care can be you putting your children to bed, taking a bubble bath, drinking a cup of tea/coffee, reading a book, binge watching your favorite Netflix show, catching up with a friend via phone, journaling or taking a walk around your neighborhood, etc.
With everything that's going on in our busy lives, the reality is that the struggle is definitely real. It's hard as hell. But, at the end of the day, you deserve to be able to get some much needed mommy time alone. This is not only imperative to you, but, your children and spouse can see a more healthier, fun, patient and present version of YOU.
I have listed 8 ways you can care for yourself as a mom - these are things that works for me and I thought I would share it with you(disclaimer: do what works best for you, these are just some suggestions).
1. Take a deep breath - Dr. James Holt explains that... (reference: https://www.uchealth.org/today/understanding-breathing-and-the-importance-of-taking-a-deep-breath/).
"Though it may feel unnatural to breathe deeply, the practice comes with various benefits. Deep breaths are more efficient: they allow your body to fully exchange incoming oxygen with outgoing carbon dioxide. They have also been shown to slow the heartbeat, lower or stabilize blood pressure and lower stress".
2. Take a bubble bath - I notice that when I take a nice warm bath, put some epsom salt in my tub, light a candle and listen to some soft music it makes me feel as though my mind and body is at ease. This also gives me space to reflect, rejuvenate and re-center my thoughts.
3. Express gratitude - After coming home from a long day of work/school/or being a stay at home mama, I want to encourage you to write down 1-10 things and people you're grateful for and why you're grateful for these things + people, each day.
4. Unplug - As much as we have our phones glued to our hands, I think it's imperative that we take a few hours or even days away from technology(unless social media is your job/career) to unplug and enjoy the things you have that's surrounding you.
5. Organize/declutter your space - I've noticed that when my space is clean and decluttered, it makes me feel so much better. Normally when we're stressed out, have a lot going on and simply just tired from our everyday lives we tend to have things in our spaces all over the place, which can affect us mentally and physically. Start by organizing an area in your house that you've been putting on the back burner and get it organized/cleaned. Notice how when you're finished organizing this area, how a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders and you're able to breath more easier because you've just tackled something off your to-do list.
6. Write in your journal - I honestly believe that writing makes us more mindful and courageous. Writing has helped me tackle things that I need to do, things I need to personally work on or simply expressing all of my emotions that I might be feeling that's hard to explain. If you don't have a journal, I strongly encourage you to go to one at your local drug store or a bookstore.
7. Don't be afraid to ask for help - As much as we want to be super moms and have everything under control, it's always nice to have someone else intervene in areas we may need them to step in at. Don't be afraid to ask your spouse, family member or even a friend for help when you're feeling burnout from motherhood, it's totally okay and normal to ask for help. I also want to let you know that asking for help doesn't make you a bad mom, it makes you a stronger mom that you have people in your life that's willing to step in and lightening the load for you.
8. Re-center yourself - No one said motherhood was going to be perfect, yes there are some days where everything is going great and then there are days where you don't know whether you're coming or going. The biggest thing you can do for yourself is to take a deep breath, trust yourself and re-center yourself. When I say re-center yourself - this just means focus on what it is you need from yourself and start from there.
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